Eric Schwartz aka Smooth-E electrifies with his extraordinary blend of stand-up and music in his debut comedy special. Behind his geeky facade lies a multi-talented showman who delivers an hour of mind-blowing musical comedy, physical antics, multicultural satire, hilarious characters and riotous laughter. This ain’t the same boring jokes in front of a brick wall–this is total entertainment that only Eric Schwartz can bring. Audiences worldwide will follow Smooth-E’s mantra to… SURRENDER TO THE BLENDER.
Get your digital or physical copy through my store (or use the product buttons below)!
Eric Schwartz aka Smooth-E - Surrender to the Blender (Download)Digital download of Eric's debut one-hour special--an electrifying hour of stand-up, music and original characters.
Who would’ve thought my culture-blending “Shalom Cabrón” shirt would cause so much controversy? I sell this funny shirt at my comedy shows, based on my joke about mixing my Jewish and quarter-step Mexican heritages. Fans will occasionally post pictures of themselves wearing my merch and it makes me feel like a big star with a clothing line.
But something unexpected happened on Facebook yesterday.
It all started as an innocent repost of this cute girl modeling my shirt, with duck lips as a bonus.
Then, instead of a silver t-shirt, someone saw a red flag.
Not to worry. The Mexican who originally taught me the word came to the rescue. My step-father, Jaime Valle, reassured Facebook that Mexicans often use the word in a friendly way.
No matter how hard we tried to stop it, the panic spread.
Things started to get out of hand. Was I on the brink of a race war? Seeing as it was the last night of Hanukkah, I decided to fan the flames on this Mexican menorah!
Finally, we were finding some understanding. I began to realize this was simply a Jewish mother who was concerned only for my well-being and not for diminishing the stereotype that Jewish mothers are neurotic.
The fans began to remember what this pic was really about. Racial harmony. And hot girls.
No, nobody remembers that the translated “Mitsubishi Masturbater” rubbed Latin Americans the wrong way. It became a collector’s item, so you may want to pick up a Shalom Cabrón tee before I have to change it to “Shalom Montero.”
*Wear at your own risk.
Shalom Cabrón T-Shirt (Men)Combine the best of cultures with this quarter-step-Mexican-Jew catchphrase!
Introducing the Menurkey, Thanksgivukkah’s rare bird/candelabra that won’t be seen again until 2070.
Draw, build, landscape, bake, paint, or otherwise create your own handmade Thanksgivukkah Menurkey and submit it to me at eric (at) ericschwartzlive.com. I’ll send you a free download of my Kosher Kuts Vol. 1 & 2! I’ll also post everyone’s creations right here on EricSchwartzLive.com.
After seven years together, this is the longest relationship I’ve ever had with a car. Or a woman, for that matter. In fact, I’ve had relationships in YOU that haven’t lasted as long as we have.
I remember the day we met. It was fate; a total accident. Literally, I totaled my car in an accident. I was desperate to find a rebound–something to just get me from A to B on a limited budget.
I was at the used lot looking at much lesser models when you rolled up. You were not even officially on the market yet, but I still asked about you. ”That guy’s trading it in for a Range Rover,” the salesman said.
To be honest, I never imagined myself with something as pretty as you. Your tinted windows, sleek rims and dual exhaust system were, frankly, a bit out of my league. And a sunroof?! I wouldn’t dare. … Read More